Today is the seventh day of the Chinese New Year also called as 'Lang Jit' meaning everyone's birthday~so people usually eat "tang yuan"(glutinous rice balls) on this day.
It's the 150th day here, I've celebrated my Birthday, Christmas and Chinese New Year without my family. I've spend days here running away from reality, when reality still goes on, which only means that i've been more laid back. I'm fearful of what lies ahead, I know I'll somehow make it but...I really feel dumb. I know learning is not easy and i also know that learning means to do things you don't previously know how to...but i'm scared... I know I have to step forth but people around me seems to be running while the best i can do is to walk. Fear stops me from going forth and i know that satan is using this as a tool to stop me... Well here's the news devil.. get behind me.. I'm standing up and i'm standing strong because there is a pillar of strength for me to lean on, and a wings so big that would shield me like a mother hen would shield her chicks. Every failure is a opportunity for miracle and grace. God is good, and i know no matter what the outcome is God can still use me, if only i obey.
Living without hugs and kisses is hard, but i sure know that there is a comforter who is ever willing to put me into his warm and tender arms.
Dad, mom, ko, jie, mel thank you for all your love and support through all this days. I'm really thankful and bless to have all of you. May God Bless and help all of you. Love you guys lots. :) chaoz
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